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avatar LOLIO

I became a gymrat, because I would never go to Pilates. He killed Jesus, bro WTH. I'm worse than one, I do best

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avatar LOLIO

*FIREFIGHTER AT 00:17* BATTERY FIREFIGHTER DESTROYS HIS CAREER IN SECONDS THAT WHISTLE ALL COMING SLOW DOWN *FIREFIGHTER SHOWS UP* HERE TAKE ME TO JAIL CALL HIM Hello. Fire alarm go off? Yeah. Okay. We got a little battery. Okay. Trying to mess with it. Alright, I got you. Hear that whistle? Yep. They're all coming. They're all going to show up here in a minute, okay? I just happened to be right around the corner and saw the call. The dispatcher will probably come up and talk to you, but I'm going to let Session ID: 1674.

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avatar LOLIO

when you finally meet someone else who can effortlessly switch between brain rot and deep theological discussions Hi, I'm Donald Kimball. Hi, have a nice to meet you. Session ID: 1672.

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avatar LOLIO

If you make something idiot proof, they will make a better idiot.

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avatar LOLIO

Me stumbling drunk out of my wrecked car unscathed to finish off the driver I struck: Drifting under, drinking salt, lost in the water

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avatar LOLIO

Domestic assault (beat bf for following other girls on social media), Resisting Arrest, Assaulting an officer

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